Situations Vacant

Don’t work in schools
If you don’t like people
Don’t work in pubs
If you can’t take jokes
Don’t be a judge
If you’re easily tearful
Don’t bungee jump
If you don’t do ropes

Don’t be a nurse
If you really couldn’t care less
Don’t be a monarch
If you don’t like rules
Avoid call centres
If you just can’t swear less
Hydrophobic lifeguards
No good for swimming pools

Cooks and greengrocers
Should really know onions
IT professionals
Should know when to click
Chiropodists, sadly,
Will get all the bunions
Doctors should try hard
To never get sick

For singers a sweet voice
Is good, not essential
For artists an eye
That sees without strain
For parents some strength
Physical and mental
For any human being
Some tolerance for pain

All work has its price
Its needs and its downfalls
It drains us all dry
And it sees us get old
So choose your way wisely
Pick something you’re fit for
Space exploration?
Leave that to the bold

Rachel Fox

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