Hoist With Her Own Petard

She made a great beautiful chocolate penis. She made it

and he photographed it and she sent it to a great beautiful

literary magazine. She sent it in the hope that they would

publish it. At the time that she made this penis, she gave

him a recipe for gingerbread cake. He baked the gingerbread

cake and he submitted it to the same literary magazine with

the same hope. After a long wait the editors accepted his

cake and they rejected her penis. She was indignant. She

was especially indignant since it was she who had given him

the gingerbread recipe in the first place. She demanded to

know why they had rejected her chocolate penis when they had

accepted his gingerbread cake. “It was much too large,” the

editors said. “No way could we run anything that large.”

She imagined it running off the edge of the page. But her

chocolate penis wasn’t that large, she realized, it wasn’t

 too large for publication at all. It was his 8 by 10 glossy

that made it look too large.

Anne-Marie Levine

Anne-Marie Levine used to make music before she made chocolate penises. Her website is

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