Be Someone Else, for a Change
or: Ask the Tailor, the Man that Makes the Clothes

"Be yourself"
             the counselor said.
                          Oh, thanks a bundle,
             what a head
she痴 got. I think
             I値l just ignore
                          that good advice
             she has in store.
So sweet and nice
             it gives me welts.
                          No, I think I値l be
             someone else.
Perhaps I値l grow
             a sophist beard,
                          then shave it off,
             and, when it痴 sheared,
replace it with
             a neat goatee.
                          That could be anyone
             but me!
I値l dress in tweeds
             and pleated slacks,
                          then get tattoos
             all down my back.
I値l wear a top hat,
             sport a toque,
                          I値l don a homburg.
             Tilt it. Smoke.
I値l wear greasepaint
             like Groucho Marx,
                          I値l wear white spats
             and cheat card sharks.
In fuzzy slippers
             I値l go ploddin
                          round the city,
             just like Auden.
I値l wear zoot suits
             and cut a line,
                          I値l wheel and deal,
             I値l wine and dine!
I値l hug the winds and
             kiss the sky,
                          and always have
             the best reply
when they cry,
             "How well you dance!"
                          "I left myself
                                       in my other pants."

Daniel Galef

If you have any comments on this poem, Daniel Galef would be pleased to hear from you.