Items Not to Order on a First Date

garlic anything
a triple bourbon straight up
black pepper or poppy seeds
the Mariachi band
chicken wings
oxtail stew
whole lobster
corn on the cob
a 42 oz. steak
chili-cheese dishes
barbecued pulled pork sandwich
the most expensive item
hot dog with extra onions and mustard
an extra value meal
a triple decker sandwich,
the 5 scoop banana split
a shoe shine
anything flaming
the yard of ale

 Jessy Randall

source: advertisement for It's Just Lunch, Inc., "the executive matchmaking
service for busy professionals," Philadelphia Weekly, September 8, 1999.

 If you've any comments on her poems, Jessy Randall would be pleased to hear from you.